Adult survivors of Family Scapegoating Abuse (FSA) often feel isolated, desperate, hopeless, and invalidated. The below resources have been helpful to clients in my private practice and my social media followers, and I’ve now updated the list for 2024:
Read My Book on FSA, Rejected, Shamed, and Blamed: I’ve been privileged to receive hundreds of messages and comments from people all around the world who kindly let me know how much my introductory research-based book on what I named ‘family scapegoating abuse’ (FSA), Rejected, Shamed, and Blamed, has helped them to have hope that they could indeed take steps to heal from this most insidious form of systemic ‘invisible’ abuse. My book is available internationally on Amazon and via these other major online book retailers and subscription services. If you haven’t read my book yet, I encourage you to do so.
Join my FSA Education Substack Community: Join as a free or paid subscriber to access FSA-related content that I don’t publish anywhere else. Paid subscribers receive additional exclusive content and are invited to participate in pre-scheduled live Discussion and Chat threads, as well as Q & A sessions with me. You can initiate a free subscription and check out my paid membership levels by entering your email on my Substack subscription page. Important: To prevent spam sign-ups, you must confirm your subscription via the email that will be sent to you after subscribing.
Take the Family Scapegoating Abuse (FSA) Self-Test: Most ‘family scapegoat’ self-tests I’ve taken a look at are not trauma-informed. Check out my brief FSA self-test to see if you may be in the family scapegoat role and impacted by complex trauma (C-PTSD). There’s also a full FSA self-test in my book, Rejected, Shamed, and Blamed. This self-test should not be used for diagnostic purposes. You can check out the FSA Questionnaire here.
Complete this brief Family Scapegoating Abuse (FSA) Recovery Worksheet: This worksheet will help you to explore issues that you may not realize are associated with FSA. Check out the worksheet here.
The research behind the term I created, Family Scapegoating Abuse (FSA) – and why FSA merits global attention: https://www.scapegoatrecovery.com/2024/05/25/why-family-scapegoating-abuse-fsa-deserves-global-attention/
Find Me on YouTube: As a licensed YouTube Health Partner, I provide free public education about Family Scapegoating Abuse (FSA) and its effects, as well as healing from FSA on my channel Beyond Family Scapegoating Abuse.
Single-Session Consultations for FSA Recovery: Due to a high volume of requests, as of March 2024 my Video Consultation Waiting List is closed except to licensed Clinicians, my YouTube Channel Benefactor Members, and my Substack’s Founding Member Subscribers. Learn more about my Single-Session service.
Articles on FSA: Access my blog articles here.
Curious what type of clinical signs FSA adult survivors might experience? Watch my YouTube video covering this important topic here: https://youtu.be/2gphcHq4ZmY (Appropriate for FSA adult survivors as well as clinicians and certified trauma-informed coaches.)
Are you a Clinician / Therapist or a Certified Trauma-Informed Coach interested in knowning more about FSA? Check out my YouTube playlist created especially for Mental Health Professionals. Suitable for FSA adult survivors as well.
Share My Public Service Announcement on FSA: Family scapegoating abuse is painfully under-recognized by the general public – and is often missed by treating Mental Health professionals. Consider sharing this Public Service Announcement I created to raise awareness about this form of insidious, systemic psycho-emotional abuse.
Complex Trauma (C-PTSD) Workbook: I use Dr. Janina Fisher’s C-PTSD workbook in my practice. You may want to take a look at it to see if it might benefit you. Best used with a trauma-informed therapist or certified trauma-informed coach. You can learn more about Dr. Fisher’s workbook here: Transforming the Living Legacy of Trauma. Dr. Fisher also has an international search feature on her website to find a therapist trained in Trauma Informed Stabilization Treatment (TIST).
Women’s Only Private Facebook Support Group: Several of my clients have found support and help here within this private Facebook community run by Rhonda (tell her I sent you): Scapegoat Daughters. Read this guide to understand privacy settings on FaceBook: https://www.facebook.com/community/using-key-groups-tools/understanding-your-privacy-settings/
My Colleague Dr. Erin Watson’s Blog: Dr. Watson covers Narcissistic Abuse, Scapegoating, Betrayal Trauma and more. Her writing and insights are powerful and you will not want to miss her offerings: https://www.drerinwatson.com/
‘Focusing’ by Eugene Gendin: Focusing is a 6-step self-help tool to help get insight on something that is bothering you. It’s a body-centred approach that orients to your “felt sense” of an issue. A few survivors I know have found Focusing helpful in their FSA healing journey. You can learn more about ‘Focusing’ here: https://counsellinginhamilton.com/focusing/
10 Self-Care Tips for FSA Adult Survivors: I wrote this originally for my clieishernts in my private practice. It’s been available on my website for awhile, but some of you may have missed it or could use these ‘friendly reminders’. You may access my article here.
11 Principles Supporting Narcissistic Family Abuse Recovery: Narcissistic family systems differ somewhat from dysfunctional ones and there are some things you will need to be clear on if you intend to embark on a journey of hope and healing if the scapegoating abuse you experienced is fueled by narcissistic family dynamics. Read about the 11 principles I use in my work with FSA clients raised in narcissistic family systems here: https://www.scapegoatrecovery.com/2024/03/03/recovering-from-narcissistic-family-abuse/
Free Affirmations Playlist: I created these affirmations for adult survivors of FSA for my private practice clients as well as my YouTube community and they are proving to be a very helpful tool, based on the feedback I’ve been getting. For best results, read the instructions in the video descriptions.
10 Strategies for Navigating Family Gatherings: I wrote this article originally to help my FSA adult survivor clients over the holidays, but you can apply these strategies to any family gathering you plan to attend (item 10 addresses those who have ended contact). Read my article here.
Understanding the Pathological Family Projective Identification Process: Read my article to understand the underlying forces that support family scapegoating abuse (FSA) in families.
Narcissistic versus Dysfunctional Family Systems: Not all families that scapegoat are narcissistic in their structure. Learn what makes a family dysfunctional versus narcissistic by watching this video.
About Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD): These days it seems that anyone who behaves in a hurtful, insensitive manner is labelled a narcissist (or ‘narc’). This is simply not the case. Research on narcissism confirms that it exists on a spectrum. Many people have narcissistic traits, but not everyone has NPD. If you are confused regarding whether or not a family member may be a full-blown narcissist, read this article from the Cleveland Clinic. You might also like to read this article about the latest findings on narcissism from Scientific American as well as this article on how to spot a narcissist.
Thinking of ending contact? If you are thinking of cutting ties with scapegoating family members, read my article on why ‘going no contact’ can be a legitimate, trauma-informed recovery strategy. You’ll also want to watch my video on the emotional aftermath many FSA adult survivors experience after ending contact with abusive family members (or their entire family system).
Center for Institutional Courage: Similar to dysfunctional and narcissistic family systems, institutions often fail the very people they should protect. Dr. Jennifer Freyd, who coined the terms ‘Betrayal Trauma Theory’ (BTT) and ‘DARVO’ (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender), has established the Center for Institutional Courage as a means of inviting institutions / organizations to examine their dehumanizing, traumatizing practices: You can learn more about Dr. Freyd’s mission for her non-profit center here: https://www.institutionalcourage.org/
Al-Anon: Scapegoating is common in family systems impacted by alcohol / addiction. Al-Anon offers confidential group support (12-Step based) for those who need to get the focus back on themselves versus ruminating over the needs / concerns of others. In-person and online meetings available. Learn more (and find meetings) here.
National Domestic Violence Hotline (U.S.): Scapegoating at times qualifies as a form of domestic abuse, particularly if you are in a relationship with a narcissist who is aligned with scapegoating family members. Confidential help is available at https://www.thehotline.org/
Legal Aid (in the United States): Find a lawyer and affordable legal aid: https://www.usa.gov/legal-aid
Support for Complex Trauma: You might also find some appropriate resources here:
- Out of the Storm – Support Group for people who suffer from C-PTSD.
- http://healmyptsd.com/ – Resources & info about recovery from PTSD & C-PTSD
- Trauma: Complex PTSD MentalHelp.net C-PTSD Article by Dr. Allan Schwartz
Searching for a Trauma-Informed (TIST-Trained) Therapist? You can search for a practitioner in your area here (they may be able to see you online if they are too far to see in person).
Searching for a Trauma-Informed Coach? You can check out this international directory here.
? NEED HELP NOW? Being scapegoated can be extremely traumatizing. If you feel in danger of harming yourself, this is a list of international hotlines where you can speak to someone: https://blog.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlines/ You can also search for crisis support in your country here: https://support.google.com/websearch/answer/11181469?hl=en
Rebecca C. Mandeville, LMFT, CCTP