“In a world of quick answers from non-experts and emotionally activating soundbites, I’m committed to providing you with deeply researched insights into the insidious systemic phenomenon I named ‘Family Scapegoating Abuse’ (FSA) in a trauma-informed manner. Your subscription supports both your recovery journey and my mission to raise global awareness about the devastating effects of FSA on child victims and adult survivors, in conjunction with my original Family Scapegoating research.” – Rebecca C. Mandeville
🌿 About Healing the Scapegoat Wound
Our Substack community is dedicated to a deeper, richer, and more complete recovery from the pain of being scapegoated by family.
If you have spent time in other scapegoat recovery communities, you have likely encountered the essential first steps: Understanding that it wasn’t your fault, identifying the abuse tactics, and validating your trauma. This initial stage of healing—the external identification of the problem—is vital.
However, many scapegoat survivors eventually hit a wall. They know the abuse happened, but they still struggle with self-esteem, boundary-setting, deep self-worth, and feeling whole outside the family’s shadow.
“Family Scapegoating Abuse (FSA) Education with Rebecca C Mandeville, LMFT, CCTP, is a source of community support, articles and education for those struggling with controlling or abusive family relationships.
Dr. Simon Rogoff, author of Narcissism, Trauma, and Celebrity (Subscriber)
A Different Path: From External Validation to Inner Wholeness
My Substack is focused on the second stage of healing, which moves beyond external identification and focuses on the revolutionary work within you. We do not just analyze the family system; we rebuild the self.
Our community’s core focus is on two interconnected processes:
- Differentiation: This is the practical, boundary-setting work. It is the process of clearly separating who you are from the toxic family projections, roles, and expectations the scapegoating system placed upon you. It is how you finally stop playing the family’s game. This means becoming emotionally, psychologically, and (in some cases) physically separate.
- Individuation: This is the deepest, most profound healing work. It is the life-long journey of becoming the most complete, authentic version of yourself—the person you were meant to be, entirely independent of the trauma and the family system you were raised in and scapegoated by. While other methods might help you survive the family or offer quick ‘no contact’ fixes, our work helps you truly thrive as an integrated, whole person.
Think of it this way: Differentiation is building the strong, protective walls around your true self. Individuation is what you build inside those walls—your unique life, purpose, and wholeness.
If you are ready to move beyond simply surviving the label of “scapegoat” to reclaiming your unique soul and destiny, you have found your home. Join us to begin the work of deep inner transformation.
“Our mission is to guide survivors of Family Scapegoating Abuse (FSA) toward unconditional internal liberation within a supportive community setting.”
I don’t just research and write about the painful effects of ‘Family Scapegoating Abuse’ (FSA). I’ve lived it and suffered from its effects.
My name is Rebecca C. Mandeville and I’m a clinician, researcher, educator, and advocate for those impacted by the devastating systemic phenomenon I named Family Scapegoating Abuse (FSA). I’m also the author of the first book on FSA, Rejected, Shamed, and Blamed. I was the designated ‘scapegoat’ in my own family, and through my own journey of healing and understanding, I discovered the profound lack of research, resources, and recognition for this form of traumatizing systemic relational abuse, leaving those affected without adequate community support.
If you’ve been in the ‘family scapegoat’ role, you know how deeply the trauma imprints on you, conditioning you to expect rejection, abandonment, and isolation. This makes it incredibly hard to see — let alone trust — possibilities for true connection. Yet, the path to healing isn’t walked alone. It requires the courage to take a calculated risk: The risk to connect, to share, and to build community with others who truly understand.
“I want to share my deep gratitude for Rebecca Mandeville and her book Rejected, Shame, Blamed. As someone who has been coaching individuals for many years, I’ve long understood the challenges people face when navigating toxic family dynamics. Yet reading this book brought a whole new depth of understanding to the scapegoating dynamic and the pervasive generational patterns of dysfunction that keep it alive. It not only affirmed my own healing journey, but also enriched the way I support clients in theirs. The insights I’ve gained through Rebecca’s work continue to bring greater peace, self-acceptance, and clarity — both personally and professionally. I highly recommend this book (and Rebecca’s Substack community) to anyone seeking healing and freedom from toxic family patterns.”
– Lynne Harley Life Coach, Speaker, and Bestselling Author of What If You Could? and the soon-to-be-released I Can Do It Afraid!
You’re not alone
The wounds of FSA can be deep and isolating. You may grapple with self-doubt, difficulty trusting others, and a persistent feeling of being “not enough.” You may doubt your painful family experiences, asking yourself, “Was it really that bad?” You may also ruminate and feel paralyzed and confused about how to move forward – you may even wonder if you can. Healing from this specific form of abuse – which, per my original FSA research, often results in complex trauma – requires a unique clinical understanding, expertly-crafted educational content, and a supportive community with a facilitator who truly understands.
On this Substack, I offer a unique space for those seeking to understand and heal from family scapegoating abuse. This isn’t just another general mental health space. This is a focused, expert-led community specifically designed for adult survivors of Family Scapegoating Abuse. It’s about fostering a vibrant community of intelligent, emotionally mature individuals committed to genuine healing and growth.
Here, you’ll find:
- Expert Guidance: Insights, resources, and perspectives informed by my deep understanding of FSA and its impact. As mentioned above, I’m the researcher who coined the term Family Scapegoating Abuse and have over 20 years of trauma-informed clinical experience working with survivors of ‘invisible’ systemic abuse. I’m also an FSA survivor myself and understand the unique challenges recovering from FSA poses.
- A Validating Community: Connect with fellow survivors who understand the unique dynamics of being the target of Family Scapegoating Abuse. Share your experiences, find support, and know that you are truly seen, heard, and believed.
- Discover Steps for Healing: Explore practical tools and strategies to navigate the emotional aftermath of FSA, build self-compassion, and realign with your true self, free of the ‘scapegoat narrative’.
- Targeted Content: Gain access to my entire archive of in-depth articles, all of which are informed by my pioneering research on FSA.
Imagine a space where:
- You have direct access to the leading world expert on FSA via Direct Messages, Post comments, and Chat threads. (I am not available on Sundays and Mondays)
- You don’t have to explain the complexities of your family dynamics.
- Your feelings of confusion, anger, loss, and grief are met with empathy and understanding by others who understand.
- You can learn – and receive support – from others who are on a similar healing journey via our Ask the Community feature in our Chat space.
- You are supported in your unique journey of experiencing your innate wholeness as you individuate and differentiate from your dysfunctional family system.
- You recognize – and move beyond – the damaging ‘scapegoat narrative’ that has held you back in life.
This community offers you the opportunity to:
- Break free from the internalized narratives of the past.
- Develop a stronger sense of self-worth and self-compassion.
- Build connections with others who truly understand your experience an online community setting.
- Empower yourself on your healing journey.
My Healing the Scapegoat Wound Substack is designed for those ready to delve deep, engage meaningfully, and invest in their journey toward recovery and what I like to call ‘true-self’ reclamation. Here, you’ll find a space where taking that risk to connect is not only safe but celebrated. If you’re ready to transform your understanding of family scapegoating abuse, connect with a supportive community, and move towards a life of greater clarity and well-being, I invite you to join us.
“Your work has been a life-saver for me and has changed everything in positive ways after a lifetime of FSA, for which I never had a name until I found you with your wonderful research, website, videos, book and our precious community which provides healing support from and for survivors like me. Knowing I can come to this community when things seem bleak has added a layer of peace that has made it much more possible for me to function in my daily life. Hearing about your own personal struggles with FSA has also provided a new way of healing where there is no one-up, one-down dynamic as I’ve experienced in the past with well-intentioned therapists. Your humanity, as you create, offer and share these groundbreaking truths, and your transpersonal viewpoint has bolstered my faith in life, in goodness, and in my own capacity to overcome adversity. Well done dear sister. Thank you!”
– Healing the Scapegoat Wound Community Member
Ready to experience a community that truly understands, led by the world’s leading expert on Family Scapegoating Abuse (FSA)?
Join us today and take the first step towards reclaiming your narrative and healing in a supportive community environment. We look forward to welcoming you!
Subscribe now to become a part of this vital community. Please note that my role on Substack is that of educator and community facilitator; I therefore am not able to directly counsel you on your personal family situation, but I am always happy to provide general feedback in our community Chat space. Be sure to confirm your subscription after signing up!
Frequently Asked Questions
ATTENTION: To prevent misuse of community features and to protect members privacy, as well as to protect myself from fraud, I follow Stripe’s Fraud Protection recommendations. I therefore do not accept subscriptions created with pre-paid credit cards. Your card will therefore be refunded through Stripe if you pay in this manner and you will need to re-subscribe using a credit or debit card in your name. I also do not accept payments made using disposable email addresses.
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