One of the most common phrases I have heard from clients over the past 20 years practicing as a licensed Psychotherapist and certified trauma-informed Coach is, “I’m done!”
“I’m done” can mean many things. Therefore, my first question is always, “What are you done with?”
Are you done with fawning and submitting as a means of avoiding conflict? Are you done with being told you’re “too sensitive” when you attempt to convey to someone how they have harmed you via their actions or words? Are you done with being called “crazy,” “mentally ill,” “emotionally sick,” or a “liar” when you call people out on their egregious behaviors?
Are you done with being victimized by outrageous “smear campaigns” designed to defame you or distort your character? Are you done with becoming small, stuffing down your truth, and/or swallowing your “righteous rage” over the injustices done to you? Are you done avoiding standing up for yourself because you fear retribution or retaliation, even though you were the one who was wronged?
If you said “yes” to any or all of the above, congratulations. You are on your way to recovering from family scapegoating abuse (FSA) and reclaiming your innate wholeness. And therein you will know peace.
What are you done with? I’d love to hear from you in the comments, below. You can also share via a comment on my pinned post on my Twitter Feed. Be sure to include the hashtag #DoneWithFSA.
Rebecca C.Mandeville, LMFT, CCTP, is an internationally recognized expert in family systems. She is a psychotherapist, certified complex trauma professional, researcher, author, and media contributor on child psycho-emotional abuse and its effects on adult survivors. She specializes in helping victims of ‘invisible’ family abuse reclaim their life narrative and so that they can live freely and joyously as their true self. Rebecca is the author of Rejected, Shamed, and Blamed – the first research-based book on what she named family scapegoating abuse (FSA).